To be caught insider trading is criminal, but to catch yourself is, well that’s just embarrassing. A trader has been accused of taking advantage of his position after he was found to be googling “insider trading [on] an international account”. It wasn’t his first search either. He’d started out researching how people “detect unusual trades” and how insider trading works. Little surprise then to discover he was caught, and it was his wife’s company he was betting on. Imagine the conversation … ‘Er darling … about
Have you ever tried coding? It’s fiddly, difficult, tedious even. Do it well and the world’s your oyster, mess up, say a few lines of broken code and a ‘no’ reads ‘yes’ and suddenly you’re telling people to buy shares when you meant sell … to the tune of 38% of your customers’ equities. Must have been awkward for the IT guys to explain to the head of compliance.
8. The Sheikhdown Dozens of tycoons and princes held in attempt to retrieve laundered $s
Saudi Arabia has turned some of their largest hotels into the comfiest prisons in the world. Apparently in a bid to help quash the corruption that riddles their top tycoons. It’s working though, $100bn of settlements have already been agreed with much more expected. Maybe the colour of the lounge chairs doesn’t match the wallpaper?
7. The “bulls*t castle” Airbus and the middle men – now under investigation in 5 countries
Dealing with the Government is difficult. You have to go through all sorts of middlemen to get approved, and it takes time. Lots of time. However, Airbus allegedly found a solution: buying the middle men out. The phrase ‘if you can’t beat them, join them’ is slightly different at Airbus: If you can’t beat them, pay them until they lie down and let you walk all over them. The responsible department has been slowly dismantled since 2012 when the incoming CEO accurately described it as a “bullsh*t castle”.
6. Hide and Squeak MLI pay up $48,468 for non disclosure of 68.5m transactions
Accountants show you how much money you have made. A good accountant shows you how much you have saved. MLI seem to have come under almost constant scrutiny since 2008, and, despite hiding nearly nearly $70m worth of foreign transactions from the auditors, you have to wonder if it’s starting to have an effect. Fully cooperative the moment they realised something had gone awry. They still got fined, but you could call it progress … of a sort.
Accountants show you how much money you have made. A good accountant shows you how much you have saved. MLI seem to have come under almost constant scrutiny since 2008, and, despite hiding nearly nearly $70m worth of foreign transactions from the auditors, you have to wonder if it’s starting to have an effect. Fully cooperative the moment they realised something had gone awry. They still got fined, but you could call it progress … of a sort.